The Troubles of Eating Ice Cream Around Other People

After more than a decade of eating ice cream (see how I very cleverly haven’t revealed my age yet?), I have still not managed to get to the stage where I can confidently eat ice cream in a cone amongst the general public, as my encounter yesterday showed.

I love gelato ice creams, and alternate between yummy fruit flavoured gelatos (lime, lemon, pineapple, passionfruit…) and rich chocolaty ones like triple chocolate fudge etc. So yesterday was a chocolaty turn, and I picked a new flavour – Bounty. Bounty is a type of chocolate bar thing, that has coconut inside, and a chocolate covering. It is amazingly addicting.

A bounty bar, in case you’ve never seen one, miserable and unknowingly unfortunate people

I expected that the ice cream would have bits of bar inside, or at least taste really scrumptious. Instead, I got an ice cream with a few infinitesimal flakes of chocolate that tasted faintly of coconut. Not my best choice ever. But the cone was very nice – it was a proper waffle cone. Well, I like savouring my ice cream, so I set to, licking gently at the stuff in case it fell off (as happened to a boy with a three scoop ice cream that I saw on one occasion). And I usually push the ice cream to the bottom of the cone with my tongue, because I hate having eaten all the ice cream and still having have an empty cone left. So I did, and this time, it broke the cone. Which meant I was left with an ice cream that was literally falling apart.

And dripping.

Of course, I couldn’t just let good ice cream go to waste; I had to lick it off my fingers. But it kept dripping. (This is all while I was walking with a friend as we went off in search of the right bus stop). Well, I had to get my cell phone out, to check whether I’d missed my bus or not. My ice cream, which had been manoeuvred so that it didn’t smush onto my bag, therefore somehow got onto my glasses. Which then became irrevocably smudged. And the ice cream kept dripping.

By the end of it, I was not the same person – I was a sticky, stressed out moustachioed monster with a white nose.

And do you know what my friend did? She laughed at me, and told me I was probably the worst person at eating ice cream that she knew. I had to concur – she didn’t have a single drop trickling down her cone, or a smidgen of ice cream on her face.


Have you had any embarrassing ice cream-eating experiences? Or, if you have perfected the art of eating ice cream tidily, please share your wisdom with me, an ice cream mess-maker.


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